After a Miscarriage: Coping as a Surrogate

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For any woman, a miscarriage can be a heart-wrenching experience, but for a gestational surrogate, there is the added worry she has let down the intended parents and the surrogacy agency. It’s important, however, not to blame yourself. Miscarriage is one of those things you simply can’t control and happens to almost every woman.

Here are a few ideas to get you through the initial rough patch:

Make time for self-care

Be kind to yourself. You’ve just been through an event that is both physically and emotionally difficult. It’s important to allow yourself time to heal. Rest as much as you can. Add gentle exercise when cleared by the doctor. Take some time off and do some of your favorite things, whether that means buying yourself some fresh flowers, getting a pedicure, or curling up with a book and a cup of tea.

Lean on your support system

Your loved ones want to be there for you to get you through this tough time and so does your coordinator at Surrogate Solutions. They may not know the best way to help though, so it’s important you reach out to tell them what you need. If you’re not ready to talk, consider writing your feelings in a journal.

Get professional help if you need it

If you feel you are not coping well, or those closest to you notice that you’re not bouncing back, consider speaking to a counselor. They can help you work through your feelings and get you back on your feet. If you’re not sure how to find a counselor, give your agency contact a call and they can offer guidance.

Listen to your doctor

Your OB/GYN can tell you what to expect from your recovering body and mind. Follow their recovery instructions closely, ask about any concerns you may have, and take things day by day. Your doctor can also refer you to a counselor if you would like to speak to one.

Don’t feel pressured

You are the only true judge of your physical and emotional readiness to try again. It takes as long as it takes. Your IPs may be eager to start another round, but it’s important that you are at 100 percent physically and mentally before becoming pregnant again. Your agency and IPs should understand.

If you’d like to learn more about coping with miscarriage loss or are interested in becoming a surrogate, contact the experts at Surrogate Solutions. We are here to provide the support and guidance you need throughout the process.

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