It Takes a Team to be a Gestational Surrogate – The Importance of Your Spouse’s Support

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Making the decision to become a gestational surrogate is an extremely rewarding, yet life changing experience not only for the surrogate herself, but also for her spouse. Although you will have the support of your agency, friends, and family, your spouse will be your greatest source of physical and emotional support before, during, and after your surrogacy journey. Having spousal support during surrogacy is so vital, in fact, that in many cases, it is a requirement to work with a surrogacy agency.

If you are married or in a committed relationship, your agency will not be working solely with you; your spouse or partner will also be playing a large role in the relationship with your agency and Intended Parents. Just like you, your spouse will also be required to undergo clinical testing and psychological screening prior to moving forward in the surrogacy process. He or she will also be with you at all times in between doctor visits and transfer procedures, helping you endure everything that accompanies pregnancy, so it is important to make this monumental decision together.

The support of a gestational surrogate’s spouse or partner is vital, not just for the wellbeing of the surrogate, but for the Intended Parents as well. Whether you have this support or not should be the biggest contributing factor when deciding to become a surrogate. While the topic may seem tricky to approach, the key is to begin an open and honest dialog from the very beginning, including:

  • Explanation. Gestational surrogacy may be better known that it was a decade ago, but it is still far from a household topic. Explain in detail what you would be doing, what the process entails, and the role your spouse would be expected to play.
  • Answers. Your spouse will likely have many questions when you first bring up your desire to become a surrogate, and you may not have all the answers. That’s okay! Meeting together with an agency is the best way to make sure you have all the technical and specific answers for your questions, but be sure your spouse knows and understands your reasons for wanting to become a surrogate.
  • Constant communication. Surrogacy is a unique experience in which not everyone will be able to relate. You will become your spouse’s strongest rock and biggest cheerleader throughout this journey together so it is important to always communicate what you are feeling or experiencing to ensure a smooth and happy experience for everyone involved.

No matter how certain you are of your own desires and capabilities, the surrogacy journey cannot officially begin without the support of your spouse. Bringing up the topic of surrogacy may seem daunting, but if you keep the doors of communication open and honest, you will be able to come to the best decision together for your family. For additional information on spousal support during surrogacy, please contact Surrogate Solutions today!

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