Preparing for the Birth of Your [Intended Parents’] Child

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Preparing for the day of delivery is of utmost importance, especially with surrogacy. We understand most surrogates have already had a child of their own prior to becoming a surrogate, and some may have already been surrogates previously. However, despite the history or level of experience, each gestational pregnancy surrogacy is unique to the individuals involved; that’s why it is so important to have open communication right from the very beginning.

It is best to start with an honest conversation with both the Intended Parents and agency you are working with.  If you have any specific privacy wishes for the delivery room, let them know. In many cases, Intended Parents are present for delivery, and then receive separate rooms after the birth, but this is all dependent on what you are comfortable with as the surrogate.   Since this is something so sensitive, as it is the first interaction the IPs will have with their child, it is recommended to have this discussion before the pregnancy, just to ensure everyone is on the same page.

When planning for the birth, you will also want to discuss with the agency and IPs where you will be delivering. This is important for several reasons. In most instances, surrogates and IPs do not live in the same town or city. This will allow your IPs to plan accordingly, make hotel reservations if necessary, and secure any other needed arrangements for the big day. Keep in mind that hospital protocol varies as well. If possible, try to plan a delivery and labor tour with the Intended Parents. Many hospitals will be accommodating to the specific needs of surrogacy, and this will allow you to clear up any confusion with the hospital staff beforehand regarding visitors, who will hold the baby first, and all around making sure everything will run smoothly on delivery day.

You’ll want to make sure you have a bag packed far enough in advance to avoid any unwanted surprises. This will also be one less thing to worry about when the big day arrives. Consider the following “hospital must-haves” when packing your bag:

  • Travel-size toiletries
  • Toothbrush and toothpaste
  • Flip flops
  • Comfortable clothing (2-3 days worth)
  • Gownie or robe
  • Book
  • Laptop
  • Brush/comb
  • Pads
  • Underwear/socks/bras
  • Deodorant
  • Air freshener
  • Hair ties
  • Small fan
  • Phone charger
  • Toilet paper

Preparing for after the delivery can be a little trickier, but it’s good to know what to expect. Some surrogates have developed lifelong friendships with their IPs while others leave the hospital shortly after delivery. Again, this may be something you will want to discuss with your IPs and agency in the initial preparation discussion.

Planning may seem overwhelming at first, but it will be well worth the effort to guarantee a happy delivery day without unnecessary stress.  If you would like more information on preparing for the delivery, do not hesitate to contact us at Surrogate Solutions today.

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